good lord

So in the past weeks many things have happened or not happened and then still needed to happen. I have felt that there are not enough hours in the day to fit everything I absolutely need to do in. It has been really hard not to exhaust myself though it is apparent in the pains that my body give me. The other week was literally the hardest week I think I have ever had in all my service. I was working behind myself because my project almost got stolen by some crazy doctor and then the funding paperwork got behind so I was receiving my materials at the exact time when trainings were starting. We trained the health profesionals and teachers about the causes, consequences, and prevention of malnutrition. The goal with them is that they can work as promoters where they work in getting all the community well informed and improving nutrition and hygiene practices in both their work spaces as well as the mothers of family. It was rather concerning how little the health professionals knew about malnutrition and preventative health. The same day that we had to deliver food to the small towns we received in large sacks and had to break down everything into smaller bags and weigh every one of them. The paperwork, the insistence. The not having the key to the office that was storing the food and not being to get things where they needed to be. The project is excellent in practice when we are working with the moms and a train wreck in between hopefully it gets better now that the funding nonsense has worked itself out. I am traveling to 4 smaller towns which adds an hour on to every day. I am running deparasiting campaigns. With cooking classes and teaching about hygiene. I am building cookstoves and setting up for a training for volunteers next week. I have felt fairly out of control and hoping to stay on point. I have lost weight and started streamlining coffee again. There will be 30 people in my site learning about cookstoves, latrines, gardens, and animal husbandry. It is officially approved that I can stay in my site though after these weeks of work my only reaction to the news was to cry at the thought of staying. And how I cannot keep up what I am doing and working at this rate for even the rest of this year without falling apart. I am learning how to delegate though it has resulted in people making errors that then have to be fixed and leaves me thinking it would just be better to do the things myself. But people have to learn and I do not have time to do everything anymore. I am so indecisve it is so annoying. spent some days resting though dancing with friends for hours on end helps the soul. well off to bed. hope all is well in your lives.